Morbid Humor

November 10, 2011

I know it’s not for everyone but I couldn’t get through rough times without it. Morbid Humor. Morbid humor got me through 7 years, three cancers and my father’s death. And my last ectopic where I “carried” the “Zombabies” for 5 months. I mean, if you don’t laugh then surely you are going to cry. I’d rather laugh. Although that’s a battle I’ve been losing lately.

In a previous post I made light of my ectopic pregnancies saying that either my uterus is hostile or my embryos need a mini GPS. This thought continues to grow in my brain. Sometimes scaring the shit out of me if it’s the former but making me laugh if it’s the latter. I mean, come on… tiny GPSs? That’s kinda funny.

Now I’m a fan of horror flicks – particularly cheezy ones. And creature movies. And disaster movies. Pretty much, if the planet is going to be destroyed by some natural disaster or overrun by killer creatures (vampires, zombies, weird hybrid creatures like a Sharktopus, or giant fuzzy killer bunnies) I want to see it happen. On screen, anyway. Just another side of my morbid humor. I think I’ve mentioned this before and I come by it honestly – I grew up watching all the old B&W horror movies and 50’s nuclear creature movies with Pops (and more recently my Uncle).

Confession: I’ve been watching a lot SyFy channel lately. I am unemployed at the moment so what else would I be doing?

So I’m reminded of Armageddon and Owen Wilson. Owen’s character (Oscar) is asking what the environment will be like on the asteroid they going to try to blow up.

Oscar: Ok, Mr. Truman, let’s say that we actually do land on this. What’s it gonna be like up there?
Truman: 200 degrees in the sunlight, minus 200 in the shade, canyons of razor-sharp rock, unpredictable gravitational conditions, unexpected eruptions, things like that.
Oscar: Okay, so the scariest environment imaginable. Thanks. That’s all you gotta say, scariest environment imaginable.

Owen Wilson ROCKS that line. It’s not just the words but the way they are delivered.

So. “Scariest environment imaginable.” Is that my uterus? I mean, we’ve put three embryos in my uterus. They were all there. In the right spot. And STILL they got lost? ALL of them? Maybe they were just running scared. Away from the big bad uterus monster.

Or do we need to come up with a new SciFi movie? Some sort of twisted combo of say… InnerSpace (tiny technology) meets Eagle Eye (we know where you are all at times) meets Volcano (avert impending disaster by rerouting the disaster). But good. Although I doubt that’s possible with this line up. It would be Tommy Lee Jones operating the GPS inside me herding the embryos to just the right spot. OK, how f*cked up is that? I can’t believe I just typed that. I must be losing what little sanity I have left.

tinyGPS

NOT tiny enough

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5 Responses to “Morbid Humor”


  1. I love your morbid sence of humor. Sometimes it’s all we have.

  2. sassyntubeless Says:

    is it sad that i had the same thought after my first ectopic? thanks for letting me know that im not the only one who thinks tiny gps is necessary ๐Ÿ™‚ xo

  3. Rebecca Says:

    I share your love of morbid humor. I even referenced zombies hypothetically raiding the IVF cryolab in a recent post. ๐Ÿ™‚


  4. I figured my ectopic was due to genetics … I have absolutely no sense of direction either.


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